Relaxation Techniques – Calming Your Mind Chatter At Bedtime

My stepson, who I rarely see due to a heavy work schedule, was having dinner with my husband and me. In the course of the conversation, he shared that he has a tough time getting to sleep at night. He said his mind is busy talking to him in an overloaded sort of way. “You mean ‘mind chatter’?” I asked of him. He nodded, “I guess that’s what it is. My mind can’t quiet down.” Working a 60-hour week in the hectic restaurant business, it’s no surprise that his adrenalin and his thought streams have a difficult time calming down to a rhythm of sleep — even though he is usually exhausted by the end of the day.

Mind chatter, monkey mind (one that jumps from thought to thought like a monkey jumps from tree to tree), incessant head talk — these are all terms that refer to the concept of minds that can’t sooth, focus, or fall into a peaceful rhythm.

Have you personally ever felt this way? Maybe once in awhile — or perhaps quite often?

The other night, as I was working on my next day tweets, going through emails, corresponding with some of my students — multitasking to the max — my mind was on overload. It was late at night, the day had been fast-paced and scheduled, and I was experiencing a far-from-peaceful moment as I stared at my computer screen, my fingers busily flying across the keyboard.

However, the Universe must have literally taken “note” of my state of busy-mind-chatter and through the little boost of a message from a new Twitter friend, sent me to a music-sharing website where this man’s musical compositions were posted. And voila – I was transported to an ethereal moment of mindfulness and harmony. These lilting streams just captivated me in a totally unexpected way, drawing my focus toward the very essence of the music, and away from the tense mind chatter that had been running through my brain. I felt a huge and welcome gush of “aaaahhhhhh” just wash over me as I relaxed.

Of course, the Universe works in unexpected joyful, purposeful and sage ways, but we don’t always have to wait for the little nudge from a wise Universe. We can actually take our own steps to quiet our hectic head talk, particularly in the evening hours when our bodies need to relax and wind down in preparation for the rejuvenation of sleep. Really embracing mindfulness and being in the moment are so helpful for this.

It’s important to curtail extreme multitasking late at night. When our brains are so busy with parallel streams of information for each task and activity, we remain in an adrenaline rush that is not conducive to sleep. So if you have to finish something — give your attention to that one thing. And then FINISH it and set an intention to now enter the mode of CALM.

Before bed, engage in a peaceful few moments when you consciously prepare for sleep and let the concerns of the day just wash away.

Focusing on your breathing and deliberately slowing it down are a way to begin the relaxation process. Take slow, deep, cleansing breaths and intend for your body to release stress and tension on the exhale. Imagine that all the “toxic” emotions of the day are flowing out of your body, leaving you far more tranquil. Spending just a few minutes doing this can have a wonderful result.

A classic way to relax is simply picking up a book and reading – or use a Kindle or similar device. But make sure you are not caught up in a novel that is too intense.

Meditation or guided imagery is also benefical. Use any meditation techniques you have learned, or simply sit in quiet still-time for ten minutes or more. Just let your mind drift, with absolutely no thought agenda.

Listen to a guided imagery mediation by using an iPod or mp3 player with headphones, or a CD for those not yet into the iPod technology. There are even many apps for the smartphones that are also quite effective. Some of these have soothing binaural rhythms that work with the natural body rhythms to relax you into sleep mode. There are also many guided imagery meditation apps as well. Or, just listen to relaxing music, as I found myself doing that one particular evening.

Of course, one very practical tip is to not sit up too late with the blinking, interactive computer screen (I admit, I am often guilty of this.) It keeps the mind and adrenalin flowing. Another practical tip to those who are coffee drinkers: maybe it’s a no-brainer, but it’s best to refrain from caffeine in the afternoon and evening. This will allow your body to wind down at night.

At the very end of the day, take a few moments to re-frame each day with gratitude — offer heartfelt appreciation for the high points, accomplishments and special joys of the day, as well as for the blessings in your life! By that time you should be ready to drift off toward a tranquil slumber…

Affirmations:

• I take time to focus on my breathing to relax my mind and body.
• Creating peaceful moments at night helps bring overall balance and harmony into my life.
• I spend time reviewing my day to highlight those things for which I am truly grateful.

What are your suggestions for calming the mind before bedtime — please feel free to share your thoughts here!